ideas are nothing without proper execution

.... sigh

how live is livejournal when twitter is in real-time? 

I think I'm not the only on when I say twitter has taken over. 

tbh, this could be a huge long update, since it's been a while...  but i'm going to sum it up in a few points..

> staying in Ottawa for the summer
> employed part-time at a consulting firm (www.globaladvantageconsulting.com)
> employed full-time at a Linux OS company, starting in July (www.xandros.com)
> continuing to work part-time at milestones
> volunteering as the design and branding coordinator of SPECTRUM 2009 (a conference being held in September, hosted by the school of public policy and administration management)
> volunteering to do a permanent logo for Carleton University Students' Charity Ball
> currently working on a pilot project with the school of ID and Architecture (Batawa Project 2009)

> still trying to pay off credit cards
> fell in love with montreal
> no guys!  (you heard me... NO GUYS!!!!)
> realized my passion for Urban Planning studies and considering pursuing my masters in it

.. I think that's about it!
 :D

I'll update more when I think of it.

i want summer.
NOW.

i need someone to hire me on as an intern.
anyone want to? haahaa

my mom stresses me out.  it doesn't help, really, on top of the search for an internship, the reminder that i am 30 grand in debt with OSAP, the inability to tell when I will be graduating ...  It absolutely does NOT help.

I am so frustrated.

i didn't know i could even be this selfish.
i can't believe myself...

i don't know what to do.

so i told adrian about minh.  all he could say to me was to do what i feel like i should do.  i feel like i should let minh know.  but to be honest, i highly doubt anything would come out of it, so why bother right?  i mean, i don't get the vibes back.  or even when i think i do, it's probably just me over-analyzing..  doing what we girls do best.

i wish i could be head over heels about adrian like i was with david or darwin...  i don't know.. BLARGHH...

at the gym today i spotted a really cute asian guy.  and by cute i mean gorgeous.  haha oh boy.. it's a good thing i've made it clear to adrian that i'm not looking to be in a relationship anytime soon.  i hope he really understands that though..

simply amazing :)

not gonna let it pass me by.

woke up at 12:30, made a delicious salami/egg/cheese sandwich, read some of christian carter's stuff, vacuum and dusted most of the apartment, took a nap, woke up, went for pho with dan, then met up with adrian at timmy's..  and.. ended up talking for hours!  too bad he has work in the morning..

"Happy people are patient.  They wait for the right time when they go after what they want, and they avoid unrealistic expectations with what they can't control."

to prevent my mind from wandering. 

i wanna talk to you..

Self-Confidence

As someone with high self-confidence, you feel quite comfortable interacting with other people. Indeed, you find the company of others very stimulating and enjoy meeting new people. Your relaxed demeanor in groups makes people around you comfortable too. Perhaps because you feel comfortable talking about yourself, others tend to enjoy being around you and perceive you as socially competent.

The confidence that helps you feel comfortable talking to people also spills into your own personal beliefs about yourself. Although you have several strengths, it’s likely that you also acknowledge and accept your weaknesses. But unlike some people, you take full responsibility for your actions—you rarely regret things you’ve done in the past and are not embarrassed easily.

Perhaps the defining feature that sets you apart from most people is the exceptionally high standards that you set for yourself. Your competence in social gatherings as well as at work should provide ample evidence for this. With these characteristics, it’s very likely that people come to you for advice and generally think of you as someone with leader-like qualities.

Family Orientation

As someone who is oriented to familial matters, you value the company of family-members and domestic life. If you have children already, you enjoy spending time with them very much and work hard to be a good parent. If you don’t have children, you very much desire having children in the future. And your preference for cooking and entertaining guests at home will likely ease the transition into parenthood.

You take pride in maintaining and cultivating a healthy family and work hard to achieve this. This natural tendency is easily illustrated by your preference for doing things around the house as opposed to going out to clubs and restaurants.

What really sets you apart from people that are low in family orientation is that you know how to manage your frustrations and work well on your own. This means that you are well-equipped to manage a family without letting all the work that is involved wear you down. However, as someone with strong family values, all the work that is involved in maintaining a tidy home and well-stocked kitchen might occasionally make it difficult for you to finish everything that you need to do.

Self-Control

The self-control personality dimension captures the way in which a person regulates and directs him or herself. Being low in self-control can be both good and bad. Occasionally people may be compelled to follow their intuitions and give in to their temptations, and your degree of self-control makes this likely to happen more often than not. This can be good in circumstances where being relaxed and open are important. However, in situations where it is necessary to be focused and careful, you might find that you do or say things that may be inappropriate.

As someone who exerts little control over your actions, you may find that you commit social blunders that might offend other people and get yourself in trouble. For example, if you’re given responsibility to work on a project that requires close attention to detail, you may be likely to overlook important details because you have difficulty staying focused. Consequently, you might feel more comfortable delegating such tasks to other people who are more detail oriented. Being able to recognize such characteristics in yourself and having more detail-oriented people do such tasks could be an effective way to manage your own stress level.

Low self-control may diminish your effectiveness at work. Acting too relaxed can make it difficult for you to focus on projects that require organized sequences of steps or stages. Thus, your ability to accomplish may be inconsistent. Indeed, it’s possible that you might be criticized periodically for being unreliable or unable to “stay within the lines.” Nonetheless, you may still experience many short-lived pleasures and never be thought of as boring.

Openness

As someone high in openness, you have a strong appreciation for beauty, both in art and nature. Indeed, it’s likely that you are easily absorbed in music and art, as well as natural phenomena. Another aspect of your openness is your emotional insight; that is, you probably have good access to and awareness of your own emotions.

Another aspect of the openness dimension is the tendency to think about abstract concepts and ideas. This thinking style may take the form of artistic and metaphorical use of language, and/or music composition or performance. Thus, it is likely that, either in your work or spare time, you enjoy activities that get your “creative juices” flowing.

Your tendency to be open-minded can have advantages and disadvantages. For instance, when there are no clear rules about how to approach a particular problem, your openness makes it easier for you to identify new ways to solve problems that might not be very obvious to people that are not as open as you are. In contrast, you may be bored easily in situations that lack high amounts of intellectual stimulation. In such cases, you might have difficulty excelling on projects that do not provide much stimulation or require much creative thinking.

Easygoingness

Easygoingness refers to one's ability to relax. Based on your score, you appear to work and play hard. The benefits of being moderate in easygoingness are that you achieve success through hard work, but you also know when and how to relax. Your colleagues and friends likely consider you as reliable and fun to be around.

Being moderate in easygoingness can cause you some stress, however. For example, you may sometimes find it difficult to complete tasks thoroughly and efficiently, which can cause stress for both you and the people around you. You may occasionally experience stress by working hard to reach your goals, but you value having fun and just relaxing. Knowing how to balance both work and play is a gift, and you have the key ingredients for doing this.

You have enough mental flexibility to think creatively and enough focus to implement those ideas well. This might be epitomized by your occasional difficulty focusing on subtle details, but the ease with which you’re able to adjust to changes in your life.

As someone who is neither rigid nor careless, you likely get along with most people well. On the one hand, you recognize the value of working hard and therefore consider such qualities in others beneficial. On the other hand, you know how to relax and thus appreciate people that know how to do this too. Chances are your friends and colleagues perceive you as someone that works hard, but also knows how to have a good time.

How does your personality affect your love life?


With your strong degree of confidence, it’s no surprise that you get along well with most people. Indeed, it’s self-confidence that allows people to feel comfortable interacting with others without feeling insecure and vulnerable. For this reason, you shouldn’t have much difficulty in romance, at least not initially. Your social skills will likely help relieve any anxiety your romantic partners might have on those first few dates. However, over time, the high standards that you have for yourself could potentially frustrate your partner.

Given how much you value family life, you probably get along best with people who share your values and beliefs. In fact, it’s likely that you maintain close connections with members of your immediate and distant family. For this reason, you would probably be most satisfied in a romantic relationship with someone who also values domestic life. Being in a relationship with someone who enjoys going out to parties and staying-up late at night might be fun, at least initially; yet it’s likely that you will find this tiring over time. Thus, it might be easier and more satisfying for you to develop a long-lasting relationship with a person who also enjoys spending time at home and desires starting a family. On first dates, perhaps you might suggest to your partner that the two of you spend a quiet night having dinner at one of your respective homes instead of going out to a restaurant or club.

As someone who is more relaxed than most people, you’re likely be attracted to most people. However, your free-spirited nature might make being in a relationship with a person that is more rigid than you difficult because you might perceive the person as being too uptight and controlling. For this reason, you may ultimately be most satisfied in a relationship with someone that is shares your level of self-control.

Your openness probably makes it easy for you to respect and appreciate people that are different from you. However, when it comes to romantic relationships, your openness might make it difficult for you to tolerate people that cannot appreciate diversity as much as you. Therefore, you may be happiest in serious relationships with people that share your open-mindedness. But, your openness might occasionally cause a certain degree of dependency on your end because you may be so open that you easily adopt the preferences and habits of your partners and gradually relinquish things that make you so unique. wow. that's pretty much what happened.. haha

i had another dream earlier.
honestly. i wish i didn't have to wake up.

we were chillin at your house, watching tv. and you were tryna study for stats (ha ha)... and you held me so close....

He broke a heart
And now it's raining
Just to rub it in
I'm at your door
I feel so crazy about it
You'll say I told you so
You saw it long ago
You knew he had to go
I finally came 'round
I'm back on solid ground
Can't let it get me down

It's alright
It's alright
It's alright

Yes I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned
So I call it a lesson learned
My soul has returned
So I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

Sometimes
Some lies
Can take a minute
To fully realize
His tears
Your eyes
Thirty seconds to apologize
You give it one more chance
Just like the time before
But he already know you'd give a hundred more
Until that night in bed
You wake up in a sweat
You're racing to the door
Can't take it anymore

I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned
So I call it a lesson learned
My soul has returned
So I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

Life perfect
Ain't perfect
If you don't know what the struggle's for
Falling down ain't falling down
If you don't cry when you hit the floor
It's called the past cause I'm getting past
And I ain't nothing like I was before
You ought to see me now

Yes I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned
So I call it a lesson learned
My soul has returned
So I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned

Yes I was burned but I called it a lesson learned
Mistake overturned
So I call it a lesson learned
My soul has returned
So I call it a lesson learned
Another lesson learned